Last night I was on my hands and knees washing cabinet fronts at home. I broke into the biggest smile as I was cleaning some unknown food smushed across the drawer front. One of my favourite songs (Into the Mystic) was playing overhead, Sabine was in her 'pre dinner' nap and I could hear Jakob and Louella laughing outside in the sun. It's in these rare free moments of alone time that I get a chance to sit and really reflect. There aren't many minutes (seconds) in a day that I can sit and contemplate my feelings. To actually swim around in my own thoughts. It's hard to be truly present with a household to run and three humans to tend to (often before your own needs, and certainly your own wants).
In that moment I did a little 'check in' with myself and the smile just overcame me. This simple every day moment was the kind of moment I had always dreamed of. Cleaning my own kitchen, wiping away playful hand prints with the sound of laughter echoing in the background. It's easy to get swept up in check lists and goal setting. I do it all day long, even when I'm sleeping. But the real beauty in life is in the in-between moments. I guess that's what people mean when the gush about the 'art of slow living'. Breathing in life's simple pleasures.
For me yesterday, it was that banal moment alone. I never knew busy until now... I can say that much. But it isn't smothering and it isn't overwhelming. It isn't rushing from Point A to Point B. It is meal prepping 3 times a day. Managing multiple sleep schedules. Going through a box of diapers a week. Driving to play dates. It is "busy" but it is also simple. I don't have any deadlines or clients emailing me in the middle of the night. It is the kind of busy I'd be happy spending my whole life in. Even if the girls weren't rewarding me with toothless grins and impromptu bear hugs. Though those rewards certainly encourage.